It's Not Enough Haunted
by Ravensgurl41
Summary: NWA-TNA Raven dark fic... Slash and Suicide... His love goes back to the WWE and a former lover. Next Part Up His lovers turn Please read and Review first attempt at this type STORY COMPLETE
1. Raven

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Title: "It's Not Enough" 

Author: Cat Lea Ravensgurl41@aol.com 

Disclaimer: Don't own either wrestler though I would love too. Also don't even own anything else so please don't sue. Also don't own the song used it is It's Not Enough by Our Lady Peace. 

Rating: R for implied Slash/ and Suicide. Angst 

Pairing: Raven or Scott Levy (After all he is my obsession right now) and You will have to read the story to the end to find out who his love was. Oh and don't let the song miss lead you it's not Jeff Hardy though one day I might do a Jeff and Raven fic.

Author Notes: All right this is another one for Hearts Desire, RavensEnigma and one hopefully Sweet-Steffie won't kill me for the pairing. Sorry Steffie I just couldn't help it. Please everyone be nice because this is my first attempt at a dark fic and suicide. If it sucks though feel free to tell me. Oh this is also a song fic too. 

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It's Not Enough 

* Scott Levy or Raven as most people call him now days unlocks the door once again to another cheap hotel room that he is calling home. Home since his lover and best friend left him almost two month ago to go back to another life. And another lover. Leaving Raven to be just that Raven once more. Not Scott Levy now. He comes in and pushes at the door not caring that it hadn't closed all the way. Dropping his stuff by the door and his jacket on the chair. Stuff that someone could have helped him but away if only some one was there. *

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There's nothing you can say

__

Nothing you can do

There's nothing in between

You know the truth

Nothing left to face

There's nothing left to lose

Nothing takes your place

* Raven slowly walk to the small table where there is a photo face down on the table. He picks it up and turns it over looking at the smiling face of him lover. Slowly a tear starts to fall from his eyes. He stands there for awhile as if his mind has taken him some where else. And by the small smile on his face if some one were there to see it they would have know that it had. Back to the time when he could feel his love in his arms and in his heart. *

**__**

When they say

You're not that strong

You're not that way

It's not your fault

And when you climb

Up to your hill

Up to your place

I hope you're well

There's nothing left to prove

There's nothing I won't do

There's nothing like the pain

I feel for you

* As the tears pour down Raven's face and onto the front of his shirt his mind decides that it is time to come back to the present. He slowly looks around the room and then laughs a sad and hurtful laugh. One that anyone could tell was coming from a man with a broken heart. That was if there was some one there to hear it. * 

**__**

Nothing left to hide

Nothing left to fear 

I am always here

**__**

When they say

You're not that strong

You're not that way

It's not your fault

And when you climb

Up to your hill

Up to your place

I hope you're well

* Raven drops the picture face down back on the table. No longer willing or able to hold on to it in his hands. He drops it quickly as if it is burning the skin right off his hands where he was touching it. He quickly takes a step away from the table turning and heading into the bathroom. He stands there looking at him self in the mirror not sure anymore is he is looking a Raven or Scott Levy. And not having anyone there to tell him if there is a difference anymore. Something some one could have told him if some one was there. * 

**__**

What you want

What you lost

What you had

What is gone it's over

What you got

What you love

What you need

What you have isn't real

* Raven shakes his head yes as if there is some question looming in the air. One that only he can hear or answer. Or maybe if some one was there they could have heard it too?

He reaches up and opens up the medicine cabinet the reaches to the top shelf where he slowly takes out a pack of razor blades. His hands are shaking so bad that he drops the pack in the sink spilling them out. Each of the shinny blades is catching just a little of the light coming in through the window. He looks down at them as if seeing himself in each and every one of them. And then he smiles a smile that isn't Raven but that of Scott Levy. * 

**__**

It's not enough

It's not enough

It's not enough 

It's not enough

I'm sorry

It's not enough 

It's not enough

It's not enough

It's not enough

* Slowly and with great though Scott finally picks up one of the blades leaving the rest to catch the glimmer of the evening lights as the sun goes down. He then heads into the bedroom where he sits down on his bed with paper and a pen after placing the blade carefully on his pillow. After many minutes he starts to write as once more tears pour down his face. Some of them landing on his shirt and others landing on the letter he is trying so hard to write. Tears that if some one was there could have been wiped from his face with a loving hand. If only some one had been there. *

**__**

When they say

You're not that strong

You're not that way

It's not your fault

And when you climb

Up to your hill

Up to your place

I hope you're well

It's not enough

No

It's not enough

It's not enough...

* Scott then slowly lies down on the bed carefully placing the letter on the pillow next to the razor blade. He slowly closes his eyes and tries to calm his breathing. When this is done to the best that he can he slowly opens his eyes and reaches for the razor blade. As he lifts it he sees the shattered parts of his soul and then brings it down to his wrist and with as much strength as possible he slices it deeply. He cries out with a small whimper that if some one were there they would have heard. But no one did. ***_  
_**

When they say

You're not that strong

You're not that way

It's not your fault

And when you climb

Up to your hill

Up to your place

I hope you're well

****

What you want

What you lost

What you had

What is gone it's over

What you got

What you love

What you need

What you have isn't real

* Scott Levy or Raven as he is called by so many now can feel that the end is near. And for once in a long time he feels at peace. He knows that he is Scott Levy and not Raven. He smiles a smile that would have warmed the heart of the one he loved if only he was there to see it. As the world fades one final time for Scotty Levy he sees the face of his lover above him with tears in his eyes. Tears that should have meant something to Scott or Raven if only he was there to see them. Tears that fell from Scott Hall's eyes as he watched his love die. His baby Birdman that should be flying and not dying. *

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It's not enough

It's not enough

It's not enough 

It's not enough

I'm sorry

It's not enough 

It's not enough

It's not enough

It's not enough

Author Notes: Please read and review because this is the first one that I have done like this and need to know how I did. Might do one for Scott about Ravens Death but don't really know if I should. So let me know what you think. Even if it is to: Quoth the Raven "Nevermore".

Thanks,

Cat Lea

Ravensgurl41@aol.com


	2. Haunted

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Title: "Haunted" 

Author: Cat Lea Ravensgurl41@aol.com 

Disclaimer: Don't own either wrestler though I would love too. Also don't even own anything else so please don't sue. Also don't own the song used it is Haunted by Evanescence. 

Rating: R for implied Slash/ and Suicide. Angst 

Pairing: Raven or Scott Levy (After all he is my obsession right now) and Scott Hall which you already know if you have read the first part of this story to the end. I might do a Jeff and Raven fic if anyone think I should.

Author Notes: All right this is another one for Hearts Desire, RavensEnigma and one hopefully Sweet-Steffie won't kill me for the pairing. Plus I wouldn't have been able to do this if not for Lizard who got me hooked on this music. Please everyone be nice because this is my first attempt at a dark fic and suicide. If it sucks though feel free to tell me. Oh this is also a song fic too and is part to and the final part. 

Haunted

To late... All ways to damn late. As I slowly watch as the last of life drain from your body. Too late or too slow or both to do any thing about you leaving me. But to all ways be haunted by you. As you slowly sense that I was there above you, you almost smile as if you knew that I would be there. Forever now I am locked in your final gaze. But once again too late to tell you that I loved you. Too late to tell you that you haunted me since I left you. To slow to even admit it to myself so that I come back just in time to watch you die. To die in my arms though I am sure that you don't even realize that I am holding you. To late to hear you ever say that you love me. And in many ways I too must have haunted you. 

**__**

Long lost words, whisper slowly, to me 

Still can't find what keeps me here 

When all this time I've been so hollow inside 

(I know you're still there)

Damn it Raven or maybe I should call you Scott? You Haunt me so how will I live with out you? I slowly lower you so that I can pace around the room but once more ends up back on the bed so that I can hold your now cold body. And now here I lay back here once more to this place that will forever haunt me. Where I watched you leave me for good. Too late to stop you from leaving me here alone and on my own but still you are haunting me. Too late to stop the blood from flowing out of you. Blood your blood, which covers me. All ways too late to do what I should have from the beginning. I can still feel you while I lay here. Haunted by the feelings of you as I slowly start to lose all to the hollowness inside of me. Haunted by being too late to tell you I loved you. Feeling you gone.

**__**

Watching me Wanting me 

I can feel you pull me down

Fearing you Loving you 

I won't let you pull me down

I have to move on and yet I can not because you haunt me. I need you to be here with me. Right where you left me. I want you, as I now know that you wanted me. Too late for either of us. To late I have to pull away before picking up the razor that is still here in your hand even after you are gone.

**__**

Hunting you I can smell you - Alive 

Your heart pounding in my head 

So what else can I do but to pick up the blade that took you from me. Too late to stop what is in my head? Too late to stop what is in my heart? I hear you and feel you all around me want me to join you. To late to do anything but to lie down next to you holding you as I too run the blade across my skin feeling the same burn that you did. Too late as I watch, as you must have the red flowing. My red that is now all over you.

**__**

Watching me Wanting me 

I can feel you pull me down 

Saving me Raping me 

Watching me 

I feel the cold as it seeps into my body but as I slowly look up from your body I see you. Floating about me looking down. Locked in your final gaze as you are locked in mine. Too late to stop this from happening. Too late to share another night of you in me or me in you. To late to watch you sleep but once more. Too late to hold you in my arms alive once more.

**__**

Watching me Haunting me 

I can fear you pull me down 

Fearing you Holding you 

I won't let you pull me down

To late for so many things. But not too late not this time. Because before I die I will get to tell you Raven, No Scott Levy I love you. And I see you smile so that now I Scott Hall will now let my eyes close for that final time to be forever Haunted by you as you are forever Haunted with me.

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Author Notes: Please read and review because this is the first one that I have done like this and need to know how I did. So let me know what you think. Even if it is to tell me as to: Quoth the Raven "Nevermore". And RavenEnigma this is hopefully what you want when you asked me to do one for Scott Hall about Scott Levy suicide. 

Thanks, Cat Lea Ravensgurl41@aol.com


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